Go Where You're Celebrated Not Tolerated

Day 317: “Dear to us are those who love us. . . but dearer are those who reject us unworthy, for they add another life; they build a heaven before us whereof we had not dreamed, and thereby supply to us new powers out of the recesses of the spirit.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson. I received a call asking, if I was going to be able to keep my commitment to work on a project in the ministry. It got me thinking about what was really in my heart as this subject had been on my mind for a few weeks.

When I decided to submit my gifts to the ministry I knew from working in my church where my gifts would best support the kingdom. However, I was willing to work wherever there was the greatest need. Of course, it would be doing something in marketing but not in the area in which I wanted to volunteer. It was suggested that I could work in another area for a while and then prove myself.

I actually agreed to it knowing all the time that the idea that I needed to prove myself to man was not sitting well in my spirit. I even tired to convince myself that the role I was asked to participate in worked for me because I was interacting with people. All of my life I’ve had to deal with rejection and the result of it has been me becoming an enabler and taking on other people’s stuff.

My Mac arrives tomorrow and that means graduate school starts for me. I’m working on several client projects and building my ZamZuu business. The thought of having to prove that I’m worthy to lend my gifts to the ministry doesn’t seem to be in right alignment. I want to be where I am celebrated and not tolerated. Even thought I know in my heart this is not the intention of the leadership it’s still a reality. I know the ministry God had placed inside of me is outside of the four walls of the church and in the marketplace. In no way am I offended but I do need to keep it moving and not get stuck in the politics of it all.

Tonight, I witnessed another business partner in ZamZuu get a $5,000 check and her testimony of getting into the business to save families was moving. This is what ministry in the marketplace looks like for me and my sphere of influence is in the business arena. We had Locker Room talk with our millionaire mentor Donald Bradley and I could not pay for the coaching and pouring out he did tonight.

He came up to me and told me how influential my circle was and that he wanted me to get him in the room with them. Here is a millionaire extending himself to be accessible to help me build my business and grow my genealogy. The first words I remember hearing spoken when I joined this business was “documentation beats conversation.” While I have not become as documented as I will be in ZamZuu, he recognizes who I am and I don’t have to prove myself.

Note to self- Find Your Center- magnetize to yourself all those things that are in alignment with your inner being.